Why I am Leaving Teaching….

I honestly cannot believe I am even writing this blog post. If you had asked me in January if I was ready to go full time with my blog/influencing, I would have told you absolutely not. I loved my job teaching 5th grade reading, I still love my job teaching 5th grade reading! However, the Lord was leading me into a new season…..

The truth is this past year at school has been very difficult as a both a parent and a teacher. If you don’t know, I teach were my boys go to school. I have always loved being able to be right there at school with them, but it’s become very clear this past year that this is not necessarily the best thing for Noah.

Noah’s 1st Day of PreK

Noah is currently in 4th grade (he should be in 5th grade, we held him back in 1st grade), and he has always had me at school with him. Since he started in PreK, I have been teaching at the current school where I am now. However, this is the first year where his classroom has been in the same building as my classroom. To say that this has brought on new difficulties would be an understatement.

It became very clear, early in the school year, how dependent Noah is with me at school. Because of his autism, there are many day to day activities that are very difficult for him. When one of those difficulties would come up, he would ask to go to the bathroom (or just run out of his classroom) and run down to my room. There were many times this year he would interrupt my teaching by running in crying, screaming, upset, or just needing me. It became more and more evident as the year went on that me being at school with him was becoming a problem. This has made teaching this year very difficult.

Mark came to me towards the end of January asking that we start praying about me teaching next year. It became very clear that me being at school with Noah was hindering him. As most kids learn how to be at school without their parents around age 4/5, Noah has never had to do that.

We committed to pray about the situation. My first reaction was that I wasn’t ready to leave teaching. I absolutely love what I teach and where I teach. To be very transparent, I was not in a place yet financially with my blog/influencing where I was confident enough to only depend on that for my income. This little “side job” had become a huge financial blessing to our family, but the amount I was making monthly still varied. I am a planner, so the idea of not having a set income each month scared me! Mark encouraged me we would be fine, but he understood. We wrote a pros and cons list…. and begin to pray.

Y’all God showed up. He very quickly made it very clear what I needed to do. The first thing that came up was a part time position in the church. When we launched Compass Church a little over 2 years ago, we cut cost anyway we could. Mark has gone without a administrative assistant since we launched. It was always in the plan to add that position once the church was in a good financial place. Well…. right after Mark and I had this conversation, the church had a budget meeting where they brought up this. It was said that the time had come to add a part time administrative assistant. Mark called me as soon as he left that meeting, and told me about the possibility of me taking this part time job. He knew how nervous I was about this blog being my only source of income right now. He also knew what a blessing it would be for me to get to join him in ministry in a bigger capacity then I do now. We agreed to continue praying, and also pray about this new position being a possibility….

As we were praying, God continued to make it clear. I will share with you that during this season is when my grandmother got sick. I really thought that part of me moving into this more flexible season with my job was so that I could help take care of my grandmother. However, God had different plans. After just 5 weeks, almost to the day, I took her to the ER, Jesus took her home. However, during that difficult season, God continued to confirm that it was time for me to leave teaching. Noah struggled a lot during those 5 weeks and the weeks after her passing. He had many, many breakdowns at school, which led him into my classroom. He would run away and run into my classroom. It became very difficult for us to get through a day without me having to stop teaching to try to help him. Again, it became evident how dependent Noah is at having me with him at school. Mark and I both decided it was important for him to adapt to this change before it was time to transition into middle/high school in a little over a year. (The school I teach at goes from PReK to 12th grade, so he would still have been with me).

There were several other situations that God used to confirm this decision…. but this blog post is already long enough! I will just say that God made it so clear that there was no doubt in my mind what choice I needed to make.

So this upcoming week, I will pack up my classroom for the last time. I honestly never imagined myself stopping teaching, but I also see how God was preparing me for this new season for years. It has been almost 2 and half years since I started this little hobby on here. What started as an outlet for me has turned into a real job. It’s a job I LOVE. I now see how God was developing it and preparing it, so that I would be able to leave one job I love and go full-time with another job I love! I also see how he has provided me an amazing opportunity to join my husband in ministry for a season.

Finishing up this school year has been very bittersweet. I cannot imagine not starting a new school year in September after doing that for the past 15 years! However, I am excited for this new season! I am excited to see how Noah matures and adapts to school next year. I am excited to get to spend more time with my husband every week in ministry, and serve along side of him. I am excited to get to share more of what I love with you guys!

If you made it to the end of this really long blog post…. you are the real MVP! I leave you with this verse…. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

I am letting the Lord lead, and I am excited to see where he takes me!